Malibu Lindsay

Remember when Lindsay Lohan looked like this?



And, you know, not like this?



Like Barbie before her, Lindsay has broadened her repertoire (or at least tried to), wearing many hats from acting to singing to fashion designing to...?

White-Zinfindel Lindsay:



Dexitrim Lindsay:



Coke-bloat Lindsay:



Meth-teeth Lindsay:



Crack-is-whack Lindsay:



Halcyon-haze Lindsay:



I-don't-even-know-what (lazy eye?) Lindsay:



At this point, it's almost couter-culture -- even a little baroque -- to be a Lohan aficionado. But like Brokeback Mountain, I just can't quit her!

The thing is, I *want* her to do well. Unlike Parasite Hilton and those ubiquitous, do-nothing slags on The Hills or any number of reality shows (zzz...), Lohan actually has oodles of talent. Talent to burn and charisma in spades...when applied correctly.

Lately though (as in the last 5 or so years), she seems more content to waste her God-given gifts on a desperate and futile quest to be some sort of pop-culture superstar. The problem there is that only lands you on the umpteenth cover of tabloids, in rehab (half a dozen times at last count, right?), and then turned out by Hollywood like some pariah, never to be invited back again.

But if the ever-ambitious Barbie can reinvent herself into a computer engineer and news anchor (her 125th & 126th careers!), surely Lindsay can at least find gainful employment that does not include club-hopping special appearances or ill-fates creative director turns.

Stick to your core talent, Lindsay!